i looked down into my sink
and saw a slug swimming desperately, no, drowning
in a triclosan-tainted hot water bath
and i wondered for a moment
whether the slug was pretentious enough
to think that it, too, was feeling
the full force of God’s wrath
why me? it’s not fair
what did i do to deserve this foul fate?
how is it that my God, my beloved
ranking, reigning Deity is capable of such hate?
when will there be justice for us on this salted slate?
where shall i turn now to regain
the calming comfort of a convenient faith?
then i thought, it’s just a slug
what’s its life worth at all?
with that cavalier attitude, dismissive mindset
and in my hands lay the promise of life
or the imminent threat of death
to this little one, in this quick moment
i am a god, minus nine miles tall…
i shrugged, and laughed an ignorant, loud laugh
that echoed insecurely down the long hall
with a hubris reverberating carelessly
bouncing and shaking, wall to wall
God looked on weary, sighed,
and declared in final
with frustration and pride,
“this little one, pretentious
is not my responsibility
so if it falls, let irony fall…”